Expect more nonsense that amused me next week!
Sometimes, instead of putting on some music while I work, I like to put on a familiar movie. Not one that I need to concentrate on, just some background noise to keep the noisy part of my brain quiet so I can properly visualise and work through problems.
I thought I’d put on some movies from my childhood, and I was reminded how many “kids” movies of that time were definitely not for children.
Return to Oz
A nice children’s movie about kidnapping, forced electro-shock therapy, hallucinations, decapitation, poisoning, and people turning to sand and crumbling away. And not in a metaphorical or cartoonish way.
If you think those scenes at the end of Infinity War were disturbing, well, imagine that was given a U rating and marketed to six-year-olds.
The sound of flies buzzing still makes me think of gory rabbit death doomsday prophecy proclaiming flesh tearing terror even now.
The NeverEnding Story
Yes, what I’d really like is to watch a horse drown. That sounds like a nice way to spend a Sunday afternoon.
What movies from your childhood traumatised you for life? Why not, I dunno, like tell me, or stuff? I can’t force you to, you know.
Written using that new-fangled fancy Gutenberg editor that I have something to do with!
Goodnight room. Goodnight moon. Goodnight twitter and your propagation of echo chambers and hate. Goodnight refusing to ban bigots, slanderers, and those that incite violence on an international scale.
I will go back to using Twitter for what it was originally used for – keeping up with what people I care about are doing, and telling people what I’m doing.
And my blog posts are what I’m going to be doing from now on.
Celsius and Fahrenheit are all well and good, but when it comes to describing everyday temperatures, they’re a little deficient.
-3 sounds cold.
102 sounds hot.
So, here’s a new, wonderfully descriptive, perfectly awesome scale – degrees N.
0º Nikki = 0ºC.
100º Nikki = 100ºF
( F – 32 ) / 0.68 = N
C * 9 / 5 / 0.68 = N
Want to convert them the other way? Why would you want to do that??? Tsk.
I’ve been using DuckDuckGo.com as my primary search engine for a few months, and it’s mostly a good experience. I especially like how it doesn’t track you, and extracts StackOverflow summaries!
Not that my job is mostly this.
Nope, not at all!
There’s only one thing that jars me, and that’s how it ranks suggestions.
Here they are.
There’s the thing I want, but in two languages that I’m not interested in. That means if I do the same thing I do in Google, pressing down then enter (which is practically muscle memory by now), I get an option that is less relevant than the others.
But that’s just a small glitch in an otherwise fine experience. It’s fast, not saturated with ads, and will not track at all!
“Welcome to English as a second language! As we prepare for our odyssey through the major thoroughfares and more obscure byways of the English language, it’s important to know that English is a weakly inflected Indo-European language, with Germanic, Latin, and Greek influences.”
“Please, we have to start with these concepts. Let’s start with syllable counting…”
“I just want to have a conversation. How do I do start?”
“No, no, no, I can’t let you go off just saying ‘Hello’ to people unless you understand the history of the alphabet. You might use it effectively, but in a way that’s slightly technically incorrect!”
“I think I’m going to go here instead…”
“When is the Hulk going to be here?”
“Will the Hulk smash things?”
“Will the Hulk smash Loki?”
“HULK SMASH!!! HE’S SMASHING LOKI!!!”
“Smash smashy smash!”
So, yeah, she loved Hulk.
Now that Pam is 6 – and has proclaimed that she knows what is real and what’s not, and if it isn’t real, it’s not scary – we thought she might like to watch The Avengers with us. She loves the video game, so she was excited to watch it. We thought it might be a bit much for her, but she told us that if we’re with her, there’s nothing to be afraid of.
“You’ve got nothing to fear. I’m here.” – Steven Universe
I’d forgotten how slow the movie is for the first 30 minutes or so, but Pam was asking questions and talking to us about it throughout. We don’t mind that, it’s her first proper live action superhero movie, so there’s going to be a lot she wants to ask and comment on.
Our first “oh my goodness, our hearts are going to burst from the sweetness of this” was Black Widow’s first scene. Pam saw her and asked who she was. “That’s Black Widow.” “Oh yes. She is strong. Girls can be pretty AND strong.”
Oh my goodness YES, thank you for learning this lesson at 6 years old. You can be a princess AND kick butt.
Then Captain America appeared. He was in the gym, hitting a punching bag and generally having a good workout to forget the horrors of war. As soon as Pam saw him she exclaimed, “Oooooh! He’s a strong boy!” and she had a huge grin on her face. I asked her if she knew who he was. No, she didn’t. “That’s Captain America,” I told her. She didn’t say anything, but if the word “squee” had a physical expression, she did it.
I think our little girl has a crush on Cap.
We’re about halfway through the movie now. Thor has shown up and Loki is captured. Pam is eager for the Hulk to show up and smash things.
Pizza is in the oven, and the movie will resume when it’s ready.
I’m so proud of Pam. She’s still a little kid, but she’s got such a good foundation and outlook on things. She knows the things in the movie are only fun because they’re just a story. She knows girls can be pretty and strong. She knows Loki would be a bad king because he doesn’t care about the people. She knows that Iron Man and Thor were only fighting because they didn’t get to know each other and they were afraid. These were all her own conclusions.
I’ll update later with her reactions to the Hulk.
Steven Universe is wonderful. Full of love acceptance, and magic lesbians from outer space (yes, really).
The music in it is exceptional. Such a variety of styles, from shouty punk rock to duets that could have come from a West End musical.
My daughter is currently obsessed with this song…
She jumps around, headbanging, yelling, being a joyous ball of pure energy. So I decided to find out if she’d like similar music.
Here are her opinions.
“It’s good, but it’s not as loud as the Steven Universe song.”
Hmm… loud… well I turned the volume up, but that’s not what she meant by loud.
“This is good! It’s loud!”
Ah, loud is Pam-speak means heavy and shouty! Ok, let’s see what more we can find…
“Yeah, this is good, I’d like to dance to this one! Yeah, I like this one a lot!”
I think we’ve found what she likes! Heavy speed grunge punk!
My parents never liked the vidja gayms. They rot your brain, apparently. Mindless, useless, wastes of time staring at a flickering screen.
They didn’t like birthdays, or various bits of essential medical treatment either, so I’m glad I didn’t listen to them.
Over the past few months, Pam (6) has got into video games in a big way. She’d played Pokémon Go obsessively, and she still likes Magikarp Jump, but those were really fuelled by her love of Pokémon rather than a love of games.
She wasn’t really interested in anything if it wasn’t Pokémon.
Things changed when we got Sega Classics.
To start off, she played Toejam and Earl (because we could play it together and I could help her out), and the Sonic games, favouring Sonic 2 because of Tails. Cuteness rules her world, of course. That led her to Flicky, and that’s when things got interesting.
“Mama, it’s gone wrong. It keeps restarting.”
“Oh, ok, show me?”
If you’ve played Flicky, you’ll know it’s unforgiving. Games can last less than a minute when you start learning it.
Pam was learning. Specifically, she was learning that older games are tough. None of the constant progression if you wait long enough, that modern mobile games have. No, this was the original git gud.
The cat bumped into Flicky? GAME OVER.
You hit the spikes in Sonic? GAME OVER.
Fell off the edge in Golden Axe? GAME OVER.
Do it all over again.
We’ve noticed a difference in her over the past month. Usually, she would be hesitant to try new things. She’d do them, but given the choice between playing something new, or watching a familiar episode of Pokémon, she’d choose Pokémon every time. But now, things are different. Given the large library of games in Sega Classics, she’s exploring them and picking ones at random. She’s found that she likes Ecco the Dolphin, too.
Her cries of “I can’t do it. It’s too tricky,” have almost gone. Now it’s a silent, resilient determination to win. Things aren’t “too tricky” any more, either. They’re “tricky like Flicky” now.
Her hand-eye coordination has improved. Her cooperation has improved. Her willingness to do work in order to get rewards has improved. Her concentration has improved.
She’s also learned about how skills transfer. To my surprise, she keeps returning to Golden Axe 2, which is the best in the series, but I didn’t think she’d like that style of game. She loves it though. So when she fired up Streets of Rage 2 (again, impeccable taste!) she said, “Mama, I thought older games were hard, but this one is easy!”
“Yes, that’s because you learned how to play this type of game when you played Golden Axe.”
“Oh, I didn’t know you could do that!”
“Yes babe, it’s called being able to transfer a skill, and it’s probably one of the most important things you can learn – that what you learn in one place can help you in other places too.”
So now she’s trying new things with glee, which has led her to Steven Universe.
I’m not complaining!